Grumpy Me!

I'm sick,bored and grumpy now.My cough does'nt seems its gonna be better soon and I got this annoying headache since 2,3 days ago.its like a package.All together fever,cough,phelgm,flu and migrain!Darn!I have not attend class for 2 days now and I dont think I can tomorrow.When I'm sick and bored(just staying at home),I can be really grumpy.And my daughter will be my easy prey.I can just snap and be mad just like that!I hate myself for that.Sometimes i sat down and think bout my whole life and I realize how inconsiderate I am.When I'm busy or sick or stress I will be in my hiding closet in the dark in my room.I won't care bout anyone including my daughter.i'm a bad mom..really...hukhukhuk..Being the only girl in the family,I always have my hiding place,which is my room.If I'm stresses or sad,i'll cry or turn on the radio and cry...so,its like a habbit already..you see,I just wanna be alone when I'm not happy.I think by doing so,I'm able to heal myself and maybe if I'm lucky,i'll recover after 2,3 days...

Have you ever felt down becoz you are sick?i hate it when I cant go to class and did not have any clue whatsoever! I love my daughter so much and sometimes I felt that she's growing up too fast and I just realize how much I missed her whenever I'm in my hiding closet.If  I do not go in my closet when I'm down,I'll be grumpy and snapped at her,which I dont want.Maybe I have an anger management issue or???Arrgghh,I'm so complex,nobody understands me except me!I have so many issues lingering within me now.One after another.And me being sick and unable to attend class is one of it.I cant understand why I felt so weak nowadays..Week as demotivated and my body just refuses everything.Even my brain cant conrol it anyway.My lecturer used to told us that during Winter ,usually everybodys's spirit is low.Owh,should I blame the weather??Or its just me?Maybe its been quite sometimes since my detoxification..I used to take Juvanex for detox.Sometimes when there's too much toxin,you will feel week,lazy and so on..So,I think I should get myself a detox produst a.s.a.p.Maybe I'll feel better afterwards.his is hard!I wanna be a good mom,I wanna spend more time with my daughter and I wanna be her best friend.I dont want my daughter to be closer to others rather than me.I dont want her to back off..I wanna be a good student,a good wifey and good worker.But sometimes,its too hard to be good at everything.I miss my mom and dad and brothers.I miss to chat with my dad whenever I'm down.Those wisdom words he used to tell me.I can really connect with what he said.It seems real and I believe him.What's wrong with me now??Arrgghhh..Ok2,enuff whining.I'm gonna have to stop now as my head is spinning like a gasing already!need to take paramol to cure this headache!Darn again!